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Real Love
by Jere E. Frost

Is there someone in this world you really love? I am not speaking of passion, an aching in the heart for, or even of an ecstatic delight in someone.

True love transcends the realm of mere emotion. It involves emotion, all right enough, but much more! It depends more on the lover than on the lovee. The simplest and clearest proof of this is God's love for man. He loved us while we were sinners (Romans 5:8). The key to the love was in Him, not in us. He loved us, not because we were lovable, but because He is love (I John 4:8). It was love that spoke of forgiveness for those who with hatred and cruelty crucified him, even while he was on the cross.

It is easy to ``love'' and think kindly of those who please us. Such love, if love is even the right word, does not require or reflect any noteworthy virtue or character. If we only love those who love and please us, we are no different than worldly men who react according to their own interests and feelings (Matthew 5:46).

Agape' is the Greek word used in the New Testament for the love that is a virtue and issues from character. It is required of us toward God, family, brethren, strangers, and even enemies. It is the greatest of all virtues (I Cor. 13:13) and is uncommon. It is as uncommon to love and be conciliatory toward all men as it is common for worldly people to love those who please them. This is one of the ways by which we can distinguish the true followers of our Lord (John 13:35).

Those who do not love are filled with excuses, that is, they have a self-justification in their own minds. I have known of brethren who would go for months and even years without even speaking to one another. I have known of fathers and sons fighting one another to the death, mothers and daughters deliberately hurting one another, siblings seeking to bring pain to one another, and erstwhile friends turning on one another. Yet all of them profess to love some folks, and can embrace and lavish tender care upon those they prefer.

As ones altogether undeserving of heaven's love, but fully receiving it, each one of us is under solemn obligation to love. Never mind that everyone is not lovable. That's a given. Never mind that some may have done us wrong and hurt us. We must be willing; no, we must want to forgive. We must seek for reconciliations (Matthew 18:15; 5:23-24). An unforgiving spirit prevents us from receiving forgiveness from our heavenly Father (Matt. 6:14-15).

Perhaps if we would keep a score of kindnesses received, and no score at all of hurts suffered, we would find loving others easier. A little more gratitude and a little less selfishness and self-pity can go a long way.